Anger Management

What is an anger?
Anger is a natural emotion. There is nothing abnormal about it. Anger might be normal, but it does affect you physically. When you get enraged during a traffic jam or at your kid’s soccer game, your hormone levels increase, your breathing quickens, your pulse and blood pressure soar, you start to sweat, and your pupils dilate. It has rightly been said “Control your anger before it controls you“

Anger is “an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage,” according to Charles Spielberger, PhD, a psychologist who specializes in the study of anger. Like other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes; when you get angry, your heart rate and blood pressure go up, as do the levels of your energy hormones, adrenaline, and noradrenaline.

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”- Mark Twain

Anger is most of the time pretty pointless. It can cause situations to get out of hand. And from a selfish perspective it often more hurtful for the one being angry then the person s/he’s angry at.

So even if you feel angry at someone for days recognize that you are mostly just hurting yourself. The other person may not even be aware that you are angry at him or her. So either talking to the person and resolving the conflict or letting go of anger as quickly as possible are pretty good tips to make your life more pleasurable.

Symptoms of anger:
The two types of anger are Passive anger and Aggressive anger. Some of the symptoms of anger are given below:

• Secretive behavior, such as resentments that are expressed behind people’s backs, giving the silent treatment or under the breath mutterings, putting people down, avoiding eye contact, gossiping, anonymous complaints, poison pen letters, stealing, and conning.
• Manipulation, such as provoking people to aggression and then patronizing them, forgiveness, provoking aggression but staying on the sidelines, emotional blackmail, false tearfulness, using a third party to convey negative feelings, withholding money or resources.
• Self-blame, such as apologizing too often, being overly critical, inviting criticism. Taking everything on yourself.
• Self-sacrifice, such as being overly helpful, making do with second best, quietly making long suffering signs but refusing help, or lapping up gratefulness.
• Ineffectualness, such as setting yourself and others up for failure, choosing unreliable people to depend on, being accident prone, underachieving, sexual impotence, expressing frustration at insignificant things but ignoring serious ones.

Anger Management Tips/How to control your anger?
Some simple steps you can try:

• Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won’t relax you. Picture your breath coming up from your “gut.”
• Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as “relax,” “take it easy.” Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply.
• Use imagery; visualize a relaxing experience, from either your memory or your imagination.
• Slow yoga-like exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer.
• Breathe! Inhale and exhale deeply from your diaphragm, under your chest bone. After a minute or so, you should feel some tension ebb away. You can do breathing exercises anywhere, anytime-even during an aggravating dinner with your in-laws.
• Take a break. When rage strikes, change the scenery. If possible, leave the room or take a walk.
• Use your mind. Count to 10. Imagine yourself on a Caribbean beach. Or repeat a soothing word to yourself.
• Blow off steam. Exercise, because physical activity can be a great stress reliever. Try slow, stretching moves like those done in yoga.